Humans

Human beings are a difficult species compared to the others. The other species just go about living and dying – it is simple (unless humans mess it up for them). Humans tend to not accept a lot of responsibility, have all of these expectations about each other and strong attachment to those expectations. The emotions that weave through our relationships are often not without cost.

For whatever reason humans as a whole can’t seem to face life, death, goodness and tragedy for what they are. They create gods that reward, punish and care for our species and explain away why our expectations aren’t fulfilled or tragedy strikes us. Our self-centered selves (especially those from richer countries) are enslaved by expectation, entitlement and attachment.

There are several people in my life right now facing difficult life outcomes and each will choose their own path. I have been reflecting on that the last few days. This article in the New York Times goes to the heart of what we all face at some point: Notes from a Dragon Mom, whether it is in relation to children or others. The best we can do is love each other unconditionally, live in the right now and take responsibility for our lives.

I have worked hard to reject expectation, attachment and entitlement, often with many complaints and stomping of my feet. It has been a good year and at times a hard year that has made my journey so much easier. I am far from perfect about living in the present and letting go of situations, but I am much better and no longer the biggest grudge holder you know. In fact, I don’t think I have any grudges, which is amazing. I am even over George W. Bush and Dick Cheney and I am not ticked by the Koch brothers, which is doubly amazing given my strong sense of justice and fairness.

The last few days have been good in a lot of ways. For some reason people have been seeking me out and asking for help to quickly find ways to improve their health and the health of loved ones. Right now in my exceptionally small part of the earth and my even smaller reality, taking responsibility, caring, reaching out and inspiring dominate. If I can just stay in the present and appreciate each of those actions for what they are, not what I expect or want them to be, I suspect my peace will grow. But I am not attached to that. 

Comments

[Erin Henry]

This is a very thoughtful post. I agree, we cannot be attached to influencing another person's choices. We can never know what is really going on inside another person--all we can do is be grateful for the glimpses they share with us. Just because we choose our own paths doesn't mean we don't need one another and that sometimes positive revelations come through people who are patient, loving, and present with us.